Pressurised

If you are referring to an aircraft cabin, okay. If you are referring to a situation where one feels compelled to do something, it's pressured, please people!!! When and how did this madness start? Never before have eight year old children had such a profound influence on adult vocabulary.

Vampires

Ok it's not a word, it's a concept, but I have to add it because, really, can any new ground be covered with this idea? I wonder if scripts are being written sans vampires, but when they come to being made the following conversation occurs:

"Yeah, I like the script, but can the main character be a vampire and can he/she fall in love with a non-vampire?".

"Oh yeah, that'd be so cool. That's gonna make it really edgy"

Why not combine the disaster movie genre with the vampire genre?. It goes something like this:

1) Vampires are really bad

2) The world is about to come to a catastrophic end and no one on Earth can stop it

3) Except perhaps for vampires.

4) And because they are immortal, they have to stop it, because they don't want to just be floating about in space with like, nothing to do, like, forever and ever.

5) Vampires save the world! Hooray!

6) Maybe vampires aren't so bad after all.

7) And the head vampire is in love with a human

8) And then then the humans kill the vampires. Maybe human are the real vampires after all.

The End

You can use that, for free, go ahead. On second thoughts, don't, I don't want to see another film, tv show, book, website, work of art, music or anything else that makes reference to vampires. I don't want to see it. BANNED!

And look out zombies, you're next

Town Hall Meeting

Used to describe anything other than a meeting that occurs in a Town Hall, or a meeting that is about a Town Hall.

Bespoke

I don't like it when people regurgitate words and phrases that they've heard a lot. I hate it when journalists and writers do it. And I absolutely despise it when I do it myself.

This list is a kind of therapy to help me manage the feelings of rage that I experience whenever I hear or read these words and phrases.

1. Bespoke,

unless used in relation to the manufacture of clothing.

2. Journey,

as used to describe illness or any other activity that does not concern movement from one physical location to another. I know some people with very serious illnesses find this metaphor quite comforting, so to those people I offer a dispensation. To everyone else, stop it, stop it, stop it!!! Seriously, I'm not sure what will happen the next time I hear someone use this word.

3. Way of eating,

used in place of diet. If you really believe that your chances of success with your 'way of eating' could be affected by something as small as the use of the word 'diet', then give up now and go back to eating chocolate, because honey you ain't gonna make it. Using chopsticks is a way of eating, as is using a knife and fork, or your fingers, or blending it up into a soup (or no, maybe that's a way of drinking). What you eat is a diet, regardless of whether you are trying to lose weight or not. Deal with it!

4. LOL and all LOL variants:

No one sincerely believes that the author of a LOL is actually laughing out loud. Actual laughter usually earns a ROFL or some such, in which case the reaction is in all likelihood a mild chuckle sans any contact with the floor. LOL really means 'I acknowledge that you have attempted humour'. We all know the truth, so let's drop the pretense.

5. Reach out to....

As in "I'm going to reach out to Beryl and ask her if she would like to come to tea on Sunday". Call her, email her, IM her, text her, write her a letter on pink scented paper and have it delivered by carrier pigeon to her door, but I beg you please don't "reach out to" her unless she is drowning or needs to be talked back in from a ledge.

6. That's so cliche,

has now itself become 'so cliche'. In addition, whenever I hear it, I have an irrational urge to add a 'd' to the end. It's annoying.

That is all for today. I will add more as they occur to me.